Thursday, January 22, 2009

but wait, there's more!

alright, it's been awhile since i've shared any secrets with you guys, so today i'm going to tattle on corey.  heh.  
corey has a problem.  it involves informercials.  and the fact that he believes every word they are telling him.  see, corey is cursed with insomnia.  anyone who has spent a night up knows that there is nothing good on tv during the early morning hours, and more often than not, most channels are showing infomercials.  and corey just drinks them in.  during those god-forsaken hours, it makes sense that one should have a knife that can cut through a shoe, a concrete block, and then a tomato.  remember epil-stop, the hair remover?  gave him chemical burn.  the ab-zapper?  did not zap away those unwanted pounds (surprise, surprise!).  the bow-flex that took three years of "easy payments"?  i think it was used once and now sits in our garage providing a home to many a spider.  metabolife, the pill that was supposed to melt away the pounds?  well, they were taken for a week, and then forgotten.  it got so bad, i had to forbid him from making any phone calls without consulting me first.  not that i can blame him.  they can be convincing, with their "old way" shown in black and white, with people in pain and struggling, and then the "new way," with everything so bright and shiny and good.  who doesn't want that little improvement in their lives? :) 
but we've come up with a compromise.  now when corey wants something he's seen in an infomercial, we head to the store and check out the as-seen-on-tv displays.  some good stuff can be found there.  mighty putty?  check.  miracle blades?  check.  the handy switch?  check.  next on his list: the shamwow! (i mean, it sells itself!) and the clapper plus.   i still have to reel him in sometimes, but at least now we don't have to pay shipping & handling! :)
corey admiring the glorious mighty putty

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

brother...how many times must you be burned before you see the light?



AB

Anonymous said...

I saw this cream last night that can cure any burn almost instantly. Burn be gone or something. All I know is that it's normally $49.95 but if I act now it's only $19.99. Deal right? I KNOW!

Corey

Anonymous said...

Stop!!! Stop it!!!
Mom & I haven't laughed this hard in a long time!
Kristen, you are such a talented writer... but you do have a lot of material to work with.

HeGetsItFromHisMother

Anonymous said...

I think you need a twelve step program.



AB

kristen said...

Speaking of steps, last year we got the Magic Bullet. Just three easy steps and you can basically have any sauce, dip, or beverage you want.
1. Add ingredients
2. Press and blent for 3 seconds
3. Enjoy!

-COrey

Anonymous said...

do those work? do you have one of those ovens where you "set it and forget it"?

Jessica said...

Owen says "who wouldn't want one of the shamwows!!" He has been wanting one for months!!! He is totally sold on those... we would have a closet full if i hadn't put a stop to the info commercial watching also:)hahah

Anonymous said...

Does Earl Scheib still paint an entire care for $29.99?

Anonymous said...

Car....CAR.... an entire "Car" (automobile...motorized transportation... horse less buggy)

Anonymous said...

Okay, so I have to be the first one to bring this up?

Did he buy "THE PILLS"? You know what I mean, and those are the infomercials on every time I turn on the television.

Anonymous said...

They were selling those sham wows up in Cleveland at the Motorcycle show at the IX Center... but the creepy fast talking guy from the commercial wasn't the one doin the selling. It made it much easier to pass it up.

Anonymous said...

They were selling those sham wows up in Cleveland at the Motorcycle show at the IX Center... but the creepy fast talking guy from the commercial wasn't the one doin the selling. It made it much easier to pass it up.